I've been away for months from this place and yet at a time like this, I seek solace only here. My loved ones are safe, and yet, I feel a pang of horror deep inside. I am disturbed and this discomfort has wrapped itself around me like a dark shadow. I am also hormonal, so maybe my feelings are magnified today. I wept for the 33 dead at Virginia Tech. I wept for their families, their friends, their sisters. I kept imagining losing my precious in a tragedy like this and the image does not free my mind.
I was talking online to a friend in India today about this and he said, 'come home.'
And involuntarily, my response was, 'This is my home.'

I've been here 6 years. I was here for Columbine. I was here for 9/11. I was here for the Amish school shootings. But nothing has affected me as much as the VTech incident. Perhaps it reminds me how vulnerable we really are and how fragile our lives are. But this rude awakening towards the mortality of my loved ones, has displaced my equilibruim today. Acts of terrorism and communal violence has never taken me by surprise. It is these stories, these acts of sheer ruthlessness and evil that leave me stumped. It is with great difficulty that I learnt today - that we will never, be able to understand the human psyche. Never.

I pray for us today. And I pray for our future.